Passive Aggressive Notes

My Parents Joined Facebook **edit: any similarity to my parents or in-laws either living or dead is completely coincidental**

Awkward Family Photos

If people start making a list of describing words about me it wouldn’t go on to long before the word feminist came up.  My mom ingrained this into me even before I knew what the word meant.  I have had conversations with people who think that going by your husband’s name is acknowledging that they “own” you.  I remember how difficult it was as we were drawing near to our wedding date, thinking about giving up my maiden name.  My whole life was my mom and my sister and our last name bonded us.  Taking your name was a very emotional and weighted decision for me.  You did not understand this internal struggle and all you had to say was that you would not marry me if I didn’t take your name.  That can go on the long list of the dumbest things we’ve ever said to one another.

I know now that I will always be a Majerus but by taking your name I was making a promise to make a family with you.  There are many people named Kate, others named Majerus, Hanke, even Katharine but there is only one person in this entire world who you asked to spend their life with you.  For me, taking your name was forging us together over our individual selves, equal parts of a whole.  This is how we were introduced at our wedding and whenever I fill out anything formal that is how I choose to be addressed.  Mrs. Joshua Hanke gives me the space to an individual but also telling the world that I am your wife and we have joined our lives as one.  The name allows us space to be individuals but also to be forever bonded by marriage.

When you used to work at the bank you would tell me that your female co-workers would give you crap because you would always refer to me as your wife.  They would remind you that I had a name.  This always filled me with pride because I am Kate to everyone but I am only a wife to one person.  Today and everyday I am proud to be Mrs. Joshua Hanke, your wife.  I hope that you will always want to call me your wife.

Thank you for the husband and father that you are today and every day.  Thank you a million times for all the times I forget to tell you how lucky I am to be your wife.  Happy birthday honey, I love you!

**Disclaimer: As a feminist I believe in choices.  This means this is the name I choose to go by and if you choose something else, that is your right that I support.  Feminism to me means equality and choice.  One choice is not better than the other.  I support women who choose to work and I support women who choose to stay at home.  It is our God-given right to make these choices.  Just wanted to make sure we were clear on that.**

Why is it that it is so much easier to pack things away then to unpack them and put them away?

This does not pertain to Josh’s family or anyone in particular…just found it amusing…

Why is that before I meet the parents (at meet the teacher or conferences) I break out like a teenager?

A sign when you’re texting too much is when you hit the space bar twice and expect a period to appear.

Tired of forcing your kids to bed?  Just “race” your child to their bedroom and they’ll be begging you to go to bed.

I find it very sad that I was shocked when a young black teenager went to give money to a homeless person.

I’m alive and well

And today, you know, that’s good enough for me

-Kenny Chesney & Dave Matthews

My name is Kate Hanke and this is my website.

You can click here for more information about me and this website as well as the “cast of characters.”

You will find stories here about our family, life, and thoughts about what is going on in this great and complicated world in which we live.

Please read below for our stories.  I left the light on for you!