When I was growing up it was almost like I had two moms. My mom and my older sister Jessica. In many ways she took care of me. This made me feel very young and I was allowed to get away with things that maybe I shouldn’t have. When I earned allowance or received money for my birthday I went out and spent it as quickly as I could. Jessica would carefully save her money for something that she wanted, but mainly just to save it.
So when the time came when I needed to give a gift I would go to the back and bottom of my closet and look for something that I no longer wanted or had a use for. Jessica would carefully spend her saved money on presents that the person receiving would like. It goes without saying that on birthday’s and Christmas everyone was less than thrilled to get my presents, although they never made me feel bad about the horrible presents I would give.
Right before one of Jessica’s birthdays we were leading each other around on a trust walk. One of us would lead the other one (who was blindfolded) carefully around obstacles. When it was my turn, I decided I was sick of “safe” and thought it would be funny to walk her into the side of a boat. I thought she would just get a little bump on her head, no big deal. I was wrong (although I think she exaggerated how badly she was hurt, I mean it’s not like we were running) and she had to lay down to recover.
So that she wouldn’t be bored, I went and got the birthday present I was planning on giving to her shortly; my old copy of Matilda by Rhoald Dahl. To create a present that she would be thrilled to receive, when she was about a third of the way through I insisted that I wanted to read it and that she give it back to me right then. Needless to say, she was NOT happy about this. Turns out I am not only a giver of horrible gifts (not to mention someone that no one should place their trust in when it comes to blindfolded walking), I also come up with really bad plans.