Please Note: Do not try this at home. Kate has a lifetime of training in guilt and mental wars to achieve these results. Not safe for untrained and/or sane people.
Also, please note, no husbands were harmed in this process.
Now that Josh and I are spending nearly 24 hours a day together, there have been more moments when we annoy each other. And when I say nearly 24 hours… I mean 24/7/365. And that’s a lot of time with someone who is crazy me.
Again, let me reiterate, this should only be attempted by experts in the field of manipulation and crazy or there may be disastrous results.
This was a conversation from last week:
Josh: Do you have the numbers?
Me: What numbers?
Josh: Those papers I gave to you.
(I start searching for them, Josh comes to stand over my shoulder)
Josh: There! It’s those.
Me: NO! IT’S NOT!
Josh: Yes it is, that’s what I need.
Me: NO! IT’S NOT! I SEPARATED THESE TO CALCULATE THE NUMBERS. SEE! SEE!!
(emphatically showing him it’s not what he wants)
Josh: What’s wrong?
Me: NOTHING!!! I’m hungry!!!
(Josh leaves and goes to get me something to eat, after eating I decide I need to apologize)
Me: I’m sorry I yelled at you. I was very hungry and I’m very stressed because I feel like I haven’t gotten anything done and then you asked me for those papers, but you wouldn’t listen to what I was trying to say.
Josh: Oh, I understand, we all have days like that. I’m sorry I made you yell at me.
Check back tomorrow for how to train your child—the next installment in the series.