Battle of the sexes.

Growing up I cut off my Barbie’s hair.  I would rather play with cars and trucks and wrestle than wear a skirt or own something pink.

I never even liked the color pink…I think because it was too “girly” and I wasn’t at all.

Josh and I have always said we would let Finn play with whatever he wanted to…dolls or construction.  He has a couple dolls and recently he was gifted a bunch of baby stuffed animals that he calls his “babies.”

Once I was teasing Josh about him having to buy me a princess dress and Finn said he wanted a princess dress too.

The other day we were picking out some games.

Finn: Not that one…that’s for GIRLS.

I understand our society is a powerful force that I can’t fully understand.  He’s getting these ideas of what is for “girls” and what is for “boys” from places we don’t even realize.

I never expected him (at 3) to refuse a game because it was too girly.

Have you dealt with this issue?  If so, how?  I try to tell him there are no “girl” things and “boy” things (but obviously there are…he’s not stupid).  I tell him he should choose based on what he likes not anything else.  He still tells me he likes pink and purple…but I’m wondering if that’s just a matter of time.

And I wonder what the consequences of this are for the long term…

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7 Responses to Battle of the sexes.

  1. Pseudo says:

    My boy wanted to play pretty pretty princess with his sister… It did not mean a thing. He’s all boy at 19 and hates that story to death.

  2. It’s just that age where children segregate what they consider obvious differences. Sprite is still somewhat in that category only now she will play “Spider Woman” instead of “Spider Man”. So the imagination helps. :-)
    Sprite’s Keeper recently posted..Spin Cycle: A tradition unto itself..My Profile

  3. Kate says:

    Pseudo-
    I know, I wish I would see Finn do THAT (but he doesn’t have any siblings). I don’t want him to make his choices because of colors or princesses!!
    :) Kate

  4. Kate says:

    Jen-
    OK, I’ll calm down. I just wish he wouldn’t see things in black and white (or blue and pink as it were). I think I’ll go buy him some princess dresses!!
    😉 Kate

  5. Vince says:

    Kids change over time and peer pressure does have some to do with it. My older kid’s favorite color was pink until about the end of grade school. Now its purple. He’s old enough to understand some things are “girl” stuff but that he can be his own kid. They key is to encourage your kid to try stuff, do what they like, and not to fear being independent. Being yourself is a hard thing. My older one has figured that out (for the most part) at 15. The younger one is working on it.

    BTW, it doesn’t hurt to be even minded about it as parents. I reveled in my hot pink guitar when I had it and wasn’t afraid or ashamed to show it off. That kind of thing says a lot to a kid (besides that their dad is out of his freaking mind).
    Vince recently posted..HumbledMy Profile

  6. Denise says:

    Mmhh… I remember kind of willing to act like a boy when I was a little girl, cause I have two brothers and it was difficult to be the princess my mother and grandmother wanted, just playing with them. (To dad I was a princess 27/7, he called me this way! Right or wrong, I loved it!)
    My mother and grandmother always dressed me in very cute dresses.
    And since the age of 5 I loved very feminine shoes.
    And now I am this one always thinking of dresses and shoes! :)
    But you are totally right about what the society kind of “imposes” as girl-boy thing.
    I don’t know whether it’s right or wrong; I used to think that separating things into “boy or girl” was wrong.
    But look, yesterday I went 3 times down the stairs, from the third floor to the ground one carrying 3 boxes (that’s why 3 times), each containing 25 kg. Alone. Is it a girl or a boy thing?
    Some said I should have asked a man to do that. I say I didn’t even think of it, why? I’m strong enough!
    Denise recently posted..Indian summer and sandalsMy Profile

  7. maggie says:

    i was the girliest girly girl that was ever girly. i had oodles of barbies, despite my mum refusing to buy them for me. i refused to wear pants for the longest time (skirts and dresses only, plskthx), i lived for pink, and always wanted to be a princess for halloween. This definitely didn’t come from my mum, or any of the people in my immediate life. And I continued to play with Barbies way past when all my friends stopped. I think kids just know what they like. And maybe he called a game too girly because he didn’t know how else to explain why he didn’t like it. ;D

    (i also loved the teenage ninja mutant turtles, and as my brother pretty much refused to play with my toys, i often played with his when we played together ;D )

    hopefully his love for pink and purple lasts, though. . . there’s just something about a guy who’s confident enough to pull off those colours that makes them extra awesome, I say ;D
    maggie recently posted..If I had three dollars for every time someone asked. . . Do Your Ears Hang Low?My Profile

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